Hilarious chat with God
By Julia Fernandes
February 1, 2014
 
I looked up at Heaven today and sent an SOS message to God, (whom I also address as Papa), wanting to have a talk with him. Immediately God sent a cloud, which I promptly hopped on to and was soon joined by God at some distance away. I disembarked from my cloud and sat with God on His cloud: Below is the chat we had:
 
God: Hi Julia! How are you?
 
Me (No response):
 
God (gauging my mood): Are you sad? 
 
Me (with a blank look): I don’t know 
 
God: Are you feeling low? 
 
Me (still staring at sky aimlessly): I don’t know 
 
God (getting exasperated by now): Has anyone hurt you?
 
Me (still looking blank): I don’t know
 
God (rolling His eyes): Great! We are having the most wonderful conversation out here in the sky. (looking at the angels) Does anyone care to join us?
 
Me (finally breaking my silence): Are there no takers for true love, Papa?
 
God (with a sigh of relief): What makes you think that way?
 
Me (with a serious look): I have observed in my journey so far, half the world does not know what love is. The little few who do know, either they are mortally afraid for reasons best known to them or, like most, simply deny that they are in love. People have coined up all sorts of weird definitions of love except what it is supposed to actually be.
 
God (with his head down and a slight smile):
 
Me (looking at God): Papa, you have no idea the world is so screwed up!
 
God (removing something from his pocket): Here, take this.
 
Me: What is this?
 
God (pokerfaced): Screwdriver! Just now you said the world is all screwed up. Take this and unscrew the world.
 
Me: Very funny :(
 
God (taking my hands in His hands): You know Julia, I am Love. So, if people fail to understand, deny, know Love they are actually not being able to understand, deny or know me. It is as simple or as hard as that.
 
God (continuing further): Wait a minute! And, what are you doing about it? Why don’t you explain what love is to people? Why do you think I created you?
 
Me (with a shrug): But, I don’t want to rescue the world!
 
God: Then, what do you want to do?
 
Me: I don’t know
 
God (with a I-have-had-enough-look): Jesus, you say that phrase, “I don’t know” one more time and I will throw you down from this cloud.  
 
Me (smiling): You’re not doing that. You’re God and all.
 
God: Yeah…you Earthlings do take a lot of advantage of me.
 
(Just then something bright brushes pass me, leaving me dazzled)
 
Me (Ouch): Papa, what was that?
 
God (smiling): That was one of the stars whom you daily talk to at night, saying Hi to you, Star Style!
 
Me (awestruck): Really, how sweet!
 
God: Do you know all the stars up here love you so much? They often tell me, when we come out in the night there is only one, half-mad, girl on earth who looks up to us and talks to us. She is the reason why we are so excited to appear in the night sky.
 
Me (with a sudden realization): Oh wait, they called me half-mad!
 
God (suppressing a smile): Don’t tell me you did not know you are half-mad? How bad is that! 
 
Me (with almost tears in my eyes):
 
God (putting His arm around me): Silly girl, all of us up here love you. We love your sweet madness because it is this madness that is needed in a world that is supposedly sane, but does all sorts of insane things. Continue to be what you are in a world that is constantly trying to make you someone else. 
 
When the road ahead takes questionable turns, don’t worry. Continue walking. You will find where you are headed to go. And, if you ever go on a wrong path, I do allow for U turns. The best thing you can ever do in life is to simply live! Discover the sheer joy of living and teach others also to enjoy their life. Life is not all about drudgery and misery. 
 
It is not what you look at that matters; it is what you see that counts. If you see light and goodness, all that will be a part of your life. If you see darkness and misery, you will be surrounded by that energy. 
 
There is magic happening all around you. It is just a matter of belief. You believe and it will be possible. You can create the world that you want to only on the power of your beliefs. So, do continue to believe in all good things, and in due course of time just when you are not looking for it, good things shall spring in your life.
 
God (getting set to go): I must go now, dear. And, remember all that I have said.
 
Me: Ok, one last question. Did you make anyone for me? Is there anyone out there for me?
 
God (with a disbelief look): What do you think I am? Some astrologer!
 
Me (with a downcast look)
 
God (as he dismounts from His cloud and moves away in another cloud that carries Him to Heaven): Yes, I have!
 
As God moves further, I cannot see Him any longer, only hear His voice:
 
God’s voice from a distant: And, you know what, he is as half-mad and sweet as you!
 
And saying so, God goes back to His abode and I come back to Earth with a smile that stays on much longer than the duration of the conversation we had! 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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